You know what really grinds my grill? When Iâm out dancing with friends, and a guy comes up to me and grabs my butt.
I immediately feel like telling the DJ to stop the music, telling the manager to turn the lights back on, and sitting said boy down for a chat Iâm sure heâs had before. It goes something like this,
âRemember when you were little and you were told not to touch your friendsâ toys without asking first. And then you got a bit older and you had to ask for permission to use the family car.
Well, my body is the same. Just because I am out, having a dance, doesnât mean I came here to be groped and fondled by some sweaty boy with too much attitude and not enough balls.
If you really are someone who thinks theyâre good enough to be with me, have the guts to ask me before grabbing at me for my attention.â
And donât get me wrong, Iâm not saying itâs only men who do this to ladies, gender isnât the issue here, itâs about respect, communication and boundaries between people.
Rant over. Scene set.
Letâs talk about healthy relationships, boundaries and personal space.
Healthy relationships are fun and mutually respective. They can be formed with anyone in your life: family, friends, teachers, and other males and females. A healthy relationship can teach you as much about yourself as it does about another person.
So, whatâs good for a relationship?
Treat others the way you would want to be treated. Being respectful leads to trust building. You should learn to accept people for who they are, as well as respecting and listening to yourself.
Tell the person how youâre feeling, talk about whatâs going on in life. Make sure you are on the same page, if you disagree, thatâs ok, but be aware of those differences. In healthy relationships, people shouldnât lie to each other.
Everyone needs a little âme timeâ and their own space to retreat to. You should feel comfortable telling the person that you need some time to yourself and retreat to your own bubble. Remember, that itâs not ok for people to touch you in any way without your permission. And you shouldnât touch some one else without their consent; this includes sexual and non-sexual touching.
These are key elements that lead to strong bonds between people. Theyâre what societies are based on. If youâre not feeling OK in a relationship, and not sure how to deal, or if you have questions, visit topic pages right here on Tune In Not Out about relationships as well as these great sites Love – The good, the bad and the ugly and The Line.
What do you think? What boundaries do you set? What do you do when they are crossed? Comment below
This post was written by the YEP Crew, a group of young people who aim to address the issue of STIs and BBVs in the community by actively engaging with young people and encouraging them to make safer and informed choices.
Thank you to Student Edge for supporting the development of this blog through the provision on a rather fantastic Goodie Bag.
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DJ Image By WJGS Design under Creative Commons Licence